The van is great, but hot. My neighbor hasn't found the chain drive thingy to fix the windows yet (he's looking in junkyards, since I ain't got the $$ for new parts), and the AC is running hot. But we're mobile, we've got room, and it runs great. It's also really, really comfortable, when it's not hot outside :)

The packing's coming along, finally, because with the van I'm able to make Goodwill & storage runs and there's less junk piled up around here.

Today I packed up Jayden's entire room while he was at school. I did it fueled only by coffee; there's no food and I'm out of cigarettes. One thing's bad, the other's good, although nicotine withdrawal ain't fun. By the time I finished his room, I was tired & hurting, of course, but also my heart was racing and I felt dizzy. I took a shower, which didn't help but at least washed the ick off me. Then I left the house to go pick up some prescriptions & dump some money in the Coinstar machine at Albertson's. I'd gathered up all the pennies & nickels & dimes in Jayden's room and throughout the house, and it came to $21 and some change. I bought a lil' bit of food & put two gallons in the gas tank, and picked Jayden up at school. Then we went to my mom's and I dropped off a bag of clothes for her. They were all stuff I'd worn before I got pregnant with Jayden, really nice clothes I bought back when I made good money. She loved every single thing in the bag, which was really cool.

I've been very depressed, very stressed, but I'm doing okay. I'm trying to stay focused and get shit done, and I think I'm handling it all well, considering. My main concern is keeping Jayden happy, confident & anxiety-free. He's loving his new school - the therapeutic preschool - and he's doing incredibly well since he started there. He's been getting up all happy & smiley in the morning and there are way fewer tantrums & meltdowns.

There's nothing happening on the housing front, so on the 1st after we drop off the keys at the landlady's lawyer's office we're going to Traveler's Aid. They're the ones who will place us in a shelter, and hopefully we'll get in a decent one where we can stay for a little while. I'm hoping we don't have to move from shelter to shelter every night, but I'm not harboring any illusions that it's going to be easy. I scored some old luggage in good condition, and some clean backpacks, and we've got lots of plastic bins. I'm making checklists of the things we need to keep with us, and we can keep the bulk of our clothes & Jayden's toys at my mom's & access them whenever we need to. We'll also be taking baths & showers at her place, but there isn't room for us both to sleep there. On nights when we can't get a decent shelter accomodation Jayden will sleep at my mom's & I'll do the shelter by myself. There are some couches here & there we can crash on from time to time so it's not all bad. Besides, once we're actually in a shelter all kinds of benefits kick in so that can actually be to our advantage.

Brandy will be at my mom's; she's got two dogs and a cat and they're all used to living with each other so it's not a problem at all. Having a van is nice because we can load up the dogs & drive out to Pt Isabel and let them run their tails off.

I don't know if I'll be blogging again before we're out of here. The phone will still be on, though, so I'll be able to get on the internet & check my email. I sent a bunch of people an email asking for snail mail addresses. If I missed you for some reason, and you'd like to get cards & stuff from us, then send me your address to starmama30@yahoo.com and I'll reply with our mailing address. After the 1st I'll be getting online when & where I can, so I'll try to post here and there to keep y'all updated.